Day One: Tuesday, August 17
I pulled out of the driveway at about a quarter to six the morning of August 17. A friend's recommendation took me through Texarkana, AR. It's a longer trip than going east, but it's almost all interstate. It also means I don't have to travel the winding, up and down highways between Natchitoches and northeast Louisiana. It's annoying enough when the sun is up, but a real pain when it's still dark.
Once I hit Texarkana, I went across Arkansas, passing Little Rock on the way to Memphis. If you ever drive from Little Rock to Memphis, don't live under the expectation that you're going to see a whole lot. I hope you like fields of rice and soybeans. Memphis to Nashville is a bit more interesting once you get up into the hills and mountains.
On the aforementioned stretch of road between Little Rock and Memphis, the message of a particular billboard caught my attention. I will reproduce it here as accurately as I can remember.
USE THE ROD, SAVE YOUR CHILD
You must be born twice: once in the flesh, and again in the spirit.
I am neither theologian nor parent, which renders me unqualified to discuss Biblical advice on child discipline or the effectiveness of beating the crap out of your misbehaving offspring. I am still inclined to wonder, however, at the idea of making a connection between corporal punishment and the likelihood that Saint Peter will grant one admission through the pearly gates once their mortal body as assumed room temperature. Does spanking your kid get you into heaven?
I spent the first night with my cousins who live outside Nashville. Nice place. We ate at a pizza joint that had a 2-for-1 special going on. There were a lot of attractive, BMW-driving Vanderbilt coeds. The waitress was okay.
Day Two: Wednesday, August 18
The next morning (Aug. 18) I left the house at about 6:30. It was gray, dreary and drizzly. I would have given someone else's right arm for it to have stayed that way.
(NOTE #1: Leaving Nashville gave me the first of what I think of as "Well, gawrsh!" moments. These are times when I was hit with a sudden realization, then a counter realization that the first realization made me sound like a country bumpkin. On this occasion I was driving on the road and thought, "Wow, they've got SIX lanes of traffic all going the same direction! What a road!")
About forty minutes outside of Nashville, God in His heaven decided that day one had been just too darn easy. He opened the clouds and poured down a Biblical-proportion mountain thunderstorm. It became almost impossible to see cars that weren't directly in front of you. The speed limit was 70, but I was going about 38. Everybody had their emergency lights blinking. I kept thinking that the 18-wheeler in front of me was about to overturn and wipe out everybody else. Knuckles were white.
After an hour or so of this nonsense I pulled over to get gas at an Exxon station. After I finished filling up, the gas pump asked if I wanted a car wash. What a jerk.
I pulled into a parking space, pulled out a book and read for about 25 or 30 minutes until things lightened up a bit. The rain was still heavy for a while, then cleared up some. When I got a little closer to Knoxville, another heavy thunderstorm about the same as the first hit and slowed everything down again. These two storms were probably the worst things I've ever driven through, and I'm surprised I didn't see more cars pulled over on the side of the road. Maybe they're more used to it than I am.
Once I got past Knoxville I got into Virginia. I don't know if you're away of this, boys and girls, but Virginia is big. Actually, I'm not sure that "big" is the right word; from the southeast corner to the northeast area, Virginia is long. I drove for a couple of hours in the state, looked at the atlas and thought, "Is that all that I've done so far?" It's a nice drive, though. The route along Front Royal is pretty. I pulled into Arlington in the early evening and spent the night with another set of cousins.
Dinner was at Velocity Five at Court House. I had chicken and rice. The waitress was a nice Salvadoran girl. She was okay. She seemed a little confused now and then, but she didn't mess anything up.
Day Three: Thursday, August 19
This was a bit of a rest day, with no hours and hours of driving on the menu. I left the apartment around 7:45 in the morning and drove to the West Falls Church metro station. The great advantage of this is that I was in familiar territory, since this is the station I used when I lived on Pimmit Drive in Falls Church, VA. I had to go through a good bit of Northern Virginia morning rush hour traffic. To the people who want me to move back to D.C. I ask, "What did I ever do to you?"
It felt good to enter the metro station I had used so many times--second only to the Huntington Avenue station at the bottom of the Yellow line--and take the train into the city. I had forgotten how few people smile during their morning metro commute. I got off at Farragut West, went up 17th to M and took a left. I walked past Sign of the Whale, which has changed ownership and undergone some renovations since I was last there. From there I went down to the new Capitol Advantage/CQ/Roll Call office and saw some friends and former coworkers.
Then it was off to the National Gallery of Art. There are two types of art there that I never tire of going to see. One is religious paintings, especially the tryptiches. The other type is ships at sea. The religious paintings are mostly scenes of historical importance or certain events in a saint's life or death. A lot of them use very vivid colors. I like seeing that little dot of white paint in a character's eyes that gives them that bit of life or soul. I have no explanation for why I like ships at sea.
I left the museum and joined some friends and a supercousin for lunch at Sign of the Whale. The Santa Fe burger, fries and coke are still great. Kate the waitress was outstanding. When I said goodbye before I left she said "Come back and see me." Ack! She knows my weakness!
(Note #2: Always tell your waitress or bartender goodbye)
(Note #3: Homer Simpson once said, "She knows my one weakness--that I'm weak!")
After lunch I went to the American History Museum, which had been closed for a while for renovations. Later in the afternoon I went to the house of a couple of friends to spend the night with them and their somewhat-new son, who had not had the pleasure of meeting me yet.
Day Four: Friday, August 20
Friday was another driving day, but not a long one. I went to Tyson's Corner mall to walk around and have breakfast before hitting the road. I left around 9:45 and drove through Maryland and into Pennsylvania. An image that sticks in my mind is seeing farm houses, barns and silos next to each other, surrounded by acres and acres of corn fields. Half a mile or so later I'd see it again. It was a very idyllic scene one that people perhaps have in mind when they talk about America "how it used to be."
This stretch of the trip also led me to a recommendation. If you have the chance to drive through Pennsylvania Dutch country while listening to old school rap and hip-hop, do it.
Part of my drive took me across the river at Harrisonburg, which was one big traffic delay for some reason. I saw the city center and capitol building and thought it looked nice. I mentioned Harrisonburg to someone later on and they said, "Harrisonburg is a dump." Oh well.
While still in PA I saw the first signs for New York City. I thought it interesting that signs for NYC show up before any signs for New Jersey. It's like the highway people are saying, "We know why you're really coming this way."
I got to my sister's place around 3:30 Friday afternoon. Hoboken is nice. I'd sell my car if I lived there, though. The residential streets are narrow and allow parking on both sides of the street. They have that thing where they clean certain sides of certain streets on certain days, and you get a parking ticket if you don't move your car. You also have to have residential permits to park in the neighborhood. I find that all too much to worry about.
That night my sister and some of her friends went to Mikie Squared on Washington St. The waitress was nice, and the mac and cheese was very good. Some friends of a friend joined us later on, two Colombian a Turkish girl. I may have to look into Turkish girls a little more. A good time was had by all.
Day Five: Saturday, August 21
My sister and I took the train to the Bronx to see the Mariners/Yankees game at the new Yankee Stadium. We sat in the Jim Beam suite of seats, 300 level directly behind home plate. Ichiro led off with a home run and added another later on. Yankees won 9-5, with Rivera closing. This Derek Jeter fellow may be pretty good someday.
That evening we had pizza delivered--just about every place near my sister's in Hoboken delivers for free--and it was delicious. I mean really, really delicious. There was something about the cheese and grease that sets of some sort of taste receptor in my tongue and brain and makes it go wild.
Day Six: Sunday, August 22
Sunday my sister went out to golf, so I stayed at the apartment and read while sitting in a chair with a farting dog in my lap. He's a nice little fellow otherwise. That evening we went to a beer garden and had burgers and beer.
You're not interested in Monday or Tuesday, so I'll skip it except for noting that I parked in a nearby hospital parking lot to avoid getting ticketed.
Wednesday we hung out a the apartment and watched TV. I'm very happy that my sister has gotten hooked on Bones. I walked down Washington Street and went past the Cake Boss place. I passed it a few times while I was there, and there were probably never fewer than 150-200 people waiting in line to get in.
Day Nine: Thursday, August 26
I left Hoboken around noon after running some errands that included a stop at Dunkin' Donuts. My Garmin GPS unit took me down US 1 South past Newark, which was a slow, traffic-heavy route. I was really in no hurry, so it was no big deal. I caught I-95 through Philadelphia. From the raised road I was on I could see the game on the scoreboard at Citizens Bank Park, the home of the Phillies.
I kept expecting to hit one of the 95s: 195, 295, 395, 495. I saw some signs for Baltimore, but my GPS told me to exit to 301 S in Maryland before I could get to one. This was a very easy, smooth highway through a mostly country setting. I took out the road atlas to see exactly where I was. At this point it occurred to me I was being diverted from certain routes for the following reason: soon after I bought my GPS unit, I programmed it to avoid toll roads. This is why I didn't see the Garden State Parkway or any Beltway action.
This route took me across the Chesapeake Bay Bridge, which is an enormous, impressive and more than a little frightening structure on which to drive. I could look to either side and see the huge expanse of water that is the Bay. It's also pretty darn high up, since it has to accommodate some tall ships passing under it.
Headed towards D.C. on Highway 50--an excellent road, by the way--I saw heavy traffic leaving the city. I laughed at the fools caught in evening rush hour traffic. I entered Northeast D.C., hit New York Avenue and then Rhode Island Avenue. I knew where I was most of the time despite having never spent much time in upper NE.
At this point I figured my GPS really loved me, since it took me past St. Matthew's Cathedral on RI Ave, then past Sign of the Whale on M Street.
Then I hit Georgetown. At 5:15pm. On a Friday.
I mocked those who were caught in D.C. exit traffic. Then I drove through Georgetown, and I mocked myself.
I eventually got to the Holiday Inn in Rosslyn. From there I took the train back to the city for dinner on a Thursday night at Sign of the Whale. For years this was my de facto routine, and I was extremely happy to be able to do it again. I met my friend Melanie for burgers and a drink. The music was way too loud, but the food was good and the Mexican waitress was nice, fun and spunky.
Day Ten: Friday, August 27
Let me tell you a story that demonstrates an aspect of the technological element of today's society.
Friday morning I went down to the front desk of the hotel to ask if I could make a reservation at another Holiday Inn hotel. I was told I could only do it by using an 800 number. I went back upstairs to use my computer instead, but something was wrong with my internet access. So I whipped out my phone, got on the internet, went to hotels.com, searched for the hotel I wanted, but in my payment information, booked the room, and got my confirmation email. What a world.
I left the hotel parking lot around 6:30 and took 66 West, the Front Royal road. It was a grey, cloudy morning, but now and then the sun would peek through the clouds and shoot beams down onto the mountaintops. This is one of the nicer stretches to drive on the east coast, I'm willing to bet.
Instead of going back through Nashville I went to Chattanooga, a city I'd not seen in a dozen years, at least. I got there before 4pm and settled in. There was a Taco Bell twenty seconds away by foot, so I took some back to the room and watched the Saints beat the Chargers in a preseason game.
Day Eleven: Saturday, August 28
I left Chattanooga around 6:30 in the morning, and it was still almost completely dark since the sun hadn't made it over the mountains. I'd forgotten that that happened. I got into Alabama and took I-59 past Birmingham and Tuscaloosa. Let me tell you something, folks: Alabama is BORING.
I went through Mississippi, stopping just after I entered near Meridian and just before I left at Vicksburg. I got gas across the street from the Vicksburg National Park. If you ever go, stay at the Hampton Inn Suites next door.
Once into Louisiana I stopped at Popeyes in Rayville and continued past Monroe to Highway 34. This is a very hilly, single-lane road that takes you through nowhere until you get to Winnfield. You do pass the Zonkeys, however. I pulled back into the driveway at 3:28pm.
(Note #3: The Walmart brand of Stay Awake caffeine pills: Magic)
