Ah, so THAT'S who I am!

Has it really been since the 9th that I've written? Mea culpa.

As you of course know, I am a proud graduate of the Louisiana Scholars' College at Northwestern State University, located in my hometown of Natchitoches, LA. I've been back to visit several times since graduation, but none in probably the last two or three years. So it was with great anticipation that I looked forward to the Scholars' College alumni reunion that was held over the weekend. For probably over a year we'd been working on putting it together. And when I say 'we' I mean for the most part 'people other than me'. I'm not a real organization type person, and I don't like working with others. So how I ended up on the reunion committee is a bit of a mystery. The grunt work was done by other members of the committee and a woman named Janay Matt, the Assistant Director for Alumni Affairs. They rock.

However, I will admit to making one simple yet somewhat important contribution: I picked the date. Yeah, yeah, we all voted on it, but my suggesting was the one we picked. I figured March was too close to spring break commitments, and May was too close to finals. Early April is when everyone is worried about their taxes. So I looked at the average weather in Natchitoches for April 22-23, and it looked okay. Little did I know that the good Lord would bless us with an absolutely gorgeous weekend. It could not have been more pleasant. Yay, me.

I got into town Friday afternoon, and we had a happy hour at the Landing that evening. Let me make it clear that I would have been content with a couple dozen alumni showing up to chat a little. So I was really happy when I did a head count and got over sixty, and it was probably closer to seventy for the whole evening. Afterwards I went with some friends to a B&B they were staying at, which happens to be owned by my cousin and his wife.

Saturday morning was a tour of campus and downtown Natchitoches. When people heard I was going, they asked, "Why the hell are you going?" Mostly so they would ask the question, to be honest. I thought it was funny. And I like hearing people talk about the town and campus, so it was a win all around for me. We went to a new living community for students, and walked into a really nice lounge area. All the older alums first words: "Oh this is just wrong!" We also went by Morrison Hall, the current home of Scholars' classes that has been recently remodeled. It looks good. In the thesis room, you can see my awful piece of garbage, "One could cry if it were not such a farce": Adolf Hitler as a Military Commander (allow me to interrupt right now and say that Neifi Perez is the most useless hitter the Cubs have ever had. Period. He doesn't hit for power. He doesn't get on base. He doesn't steal bases. He's a human out machine, and Dusty Baker loves him. JHTDC. I can't write that out on this site, but man).

After the tour was the picnic, held under purple tents and a beautiful blue sky. Burgers, hot doges, chips, brownies, cokes. Saw some students and profs. Got a lot of sun. I'd say maybe close to 100 people there, but I could be wrong. That night was a dinner/dance at the Student Union ballroom. Spaghetti, rolls, cookies, cheese, and maybe a drink or two. I sat with a couple of Natchitoches folks (Jennifer Walsh, Andrea Elmore & husband), Dr. Cochran, and Robin and Rick Morgan, who started with me in 95. Worked my way around the room meeting and greeting. Home by midnight.

So the psychiatrist in you may be asking, "Okay, that's what you did. But how does this make you feel?" And for once I'll say "You know, that's not a bad question." It made me feel great. Fantastic. Wonderful. I was so happy. Friday night I thought that it was so great that this many people thought Natchitoches was worth coming back to. And I saw people from classes before and after me that I'd been friends with. They told me I looked exactly the same. We talked about life, the universe, and everything. Told stories about great things we'd been through at LSC. One guy said that he wanted to talk to the person who went up to a group of students reading the Bible and said, "Hey, I read that. It's pretty good. The guy dies, but he comes back in the end." Ahem. C'est moi. I'm sure I stole it from someone else, but still.

I went to class with these people, and in some cases worked with them. I argued with them a thousand times on scores of subjects, ranging from war to love to religion to feminism to poverty to pretty much INSERT SUBJECT HERE. And I'd be lying through my teeth if I said I didn't win a lot and hold my own the rest of the time. And it was being around these people again that made me think the words in this entry's title. "Ah, so THAT'S who I am!"

Now and then I'll tell people in the DC area, "I wish you could have known me back when I was nice." I know they don't really understand. They think I'm a nice and smart guy now. But they have no idea. I spent my senior year in high school and four years at LSC turning myself into a people person. But here, both through lack of opportunity or lack of effort on my part, I've become much less than what I used to be. For a while at C&A, I was able to hang on to my LSC persona. But not since. I'm a lot meaner and nastier. I curse a lot. Few people at LSC ever saw me be nasty, and none of them ever heard me curse (because I didn't).

So it is quite fitting that it would be my old school that taught me my lesson. I'd been asking myself what I need to be holding on to, and what I needed to let go. Being around my people showed me the answer. Wish me luck.